Part 1: uni dropout

I've completely given up on uni. My Philosophy essay is a week overdue and I'm yet to start, and I just went to double check that I've got a week left to do my Justice and Policy essay and found out that it was due days ago. I'm so disappointed in myself but I've just got to accept that uni isn't for everybody. Unfortunately I'm one of those people. I'm not sure if I'm even going to bother going to my Crime and Criminology exam next week. I feel so hopeless. I'm still going to do next semester; I may as well finish the year off and start a Tafe course next year. I really hope I find my feet soon.

Today I ordered myself some extensions, bought a suitcase for my Sydney trip and treated myself to a new curler. I'm exhausted!

I'm lost

I hate university. I hate it hate it hate it. I hate getting up early. I hate studying. I hate having to do before class exercising. I hate traveling to uni. I hate sitting at uni. I hate rude lecturers, tutors and students. I hate lectures, tutorials and students. I hate doing essays. I hate it all, so why do I have to do it? Why can't I just be for a little while? Why can't I sleep in and know that there's nothing that requires me putting 110% of myself into, other than myself? Why did I have to grow up so fast and make a choice that I was far too naive and young to make?

AND WHY CAN'T I GET THAT MANY WORDS IN THIS BLOODY ESSAY, OH MY GOD.

Planned Adventures

Kody and I have a trip planned to go to Sydney in September for his sisters wedding. Our flights and accommodation were paid for months ago and I've saved a couple hundred so far, thank lord yeezus! Although we're only there for a couple days, I have so much planned. Once we arrive on the friday night, we're going straight out to Darling Harbour with his family to celebrate his sister's last day of not being a bride. Once we get back to the hotel I plan to explore all the fitness/ swimming options and check out the view from the roof.

Saturday is the wedding day! I plan to get up super early and do a little shopping on Oxford street and grav some lunch. The ceremony is sometime in the afternoon. We have to catch a ferry to get there and it goes under the Harbour Bridge so that'll be cool. In between the ceremony and reception, Kody and I are having a cute date at Ladurée, a french macaron and tea shop.

The reception  is being held at the hotel that we're staying at, which is very convenient for us. I can't wait for the food! It's going to be a nice night. After the reception I assume that Kody and I will make use of the hotel's facilities; room service and sauna! Sunday will be my designated shopping day. Hopefully I don't blow all my money before then or it'll be a very uneventful day until our flight! Haha.

I'M SO EXCITED! 3 MONTHS TO GO!

Something that I need to live by more often

Howdy howdy howdy!

It's officially less than 2 months until my 19 birthday, YAYAYAYAYAYAY.
I can't wait to see what goodies Kody has gotten for me (although I already know, I picked them haha). I'M JUST SO EXCITED! I'm finally going to get another tattoo, I plan on getting a Fall Out Boy dedication (I can't think of the word I want to use so dedication it is haha).

I'M SO EXCITED FOR LIFE!

(yep I'm lame)
 (brackets)
(still lame)

Love, J :)

Happy 1st of May!

So I decided that it's time to talk about a subject a little deeper than beauty products, with the topic being really close to my heart. The topic is having someone close to you that struggles with an illness, and in my situation, my boyfriend has type 1 diabetes.

 I've never read a post from someone close to someone who has type 1 diabetes and how it effects their life as well (which trust me, it really really does) which is weird because I've had Blogspot and Tumblr for about 4 years. Having someone you love suffer from such a harsh illness is exhausting. I've endured many trips to the hospital to watch Kody be jabbed with needles nonstop, I've had to sit with him in the bathroom while he cries because he always has trouble throwing up while in a hyper, I've had to wake up in the middle of the night because I could smell a hyper coming on and try to force him to get up and take care of himself. It's draining. Half the time I feel like his mother because it's so hard for someone with type 1 diabetes to take care of themselves all day, everyday without any help. And it hurts so much when people say that Kody is too lazy with taking care of himself and that if he tried more he wouldn't have so many issues with it. It hurts even more when I know that in some ways, they are right.

It kills me when he insists on eating like every other boy his age because I can see the denial in his eyes. He just wants to be like everybody else. Health is one of the most unappreciated things in life, even for those who need it more than others. There is no special frame of mind given to those who suffer with illness, they know no better than you or I. They don't magically forget that while they have to stab themselves with needles for that KFC they just ate that millions of other people get to just get up and go. How is that fair? Why should anyone have to go through that? It's hard, it really is.